'Kenneth Bernard Watson' - The middle child and narrator of the story, nicknamed Kenny. He is ten years old, has a lazy eye and is an excellent student, both of which make him the target of bullying at Clark Elementary School.
Byron Watson - Kenny and Joey's older brother, a thirteen-year-old "official juvenile delinquent" whose many "fantastic adventures" continually get him into trouble at home and at school. He sometimes bullies and teases Kenny, but also protects him at school, and saves his life in Birmingham when Kenny almost drowns after slipping into a whirl pool.
Joetta Joey Watson - The youngest child. She is five years old, and is in kindergarten.
Wilona Sands Watson - Usually called Momma. She's the mother of the three children and the wife of Daniel. A native of Birmingham, she slips into a thick southern accent when mad or excited and complains about Flint's harsh winters. She is tough but fair to her children. Whenever Wilona wants to laugh she puts her hand up to her mouth because of a gap between her front two teeth. Wilona wants Byron to become mature and set a good example for Kenny and Joey.
Daniel Watson - Father of the three children. He's known for having a good sense of humor and the husband of Wilona. He is referred to as "Dad". When he and Wilona got married, they promised not to listen to hillbilly music.
Grandma Sands - Wilona's mother, Daniel's mother-in-law, and Byron, Kenny, and Joey's grandmother. She lives in Birmingham, and has an even thicker accent than Wilona. She is known to be a "shrunk-up" version of Wilona. She is also very strict. Byron is sent to her for the summer and possibly for the next school year so that he can change his ways. It's hinted that Grandma Sands has a crush on her friend Mr. Robert.
Mr. Robert - Grandma Sands' friend and supposedly is liked by Grandma Sands(In that special way).
Rufus Fry - Kenny's new best friend. His family moves to Flint from the South. He and his little brother befriend Kenny.
Brown Bomber - The family's car, which Byron says looks like a "Brown Turd." It had a few new additions such as: A smelly green pinecone,and The Ultra-Glide.
Buphead - Byron's best friend who is also an "official delinquent", helps Byron bully many kids, including his brother. Byron and Buphead stand up for Kenny and Rufus when they're being bullied by Larry.